My Friends


We all have friends and we all keep friends for different reasons. The basic reason can be found in the popular quote that ‘man is not an island onto himself’. No matter what we do and no matter our dispensation, you need other people in our lives. Whether you are rich or poor, tall or short, intelligent or stupid, goofy or smart, handsome or beautiful or just plain ugly (nobody is ugly), white or black, Caucasian or Asian or African or any other race, a lover or a fighter, good or bad, a terrorist or a freedom fighter, whoever you are, we all need friends.

They say that a man is not judged by how much money he has but by the company he keeps. Friends are a person’s backbone or a person’s weakness depending on what kind of friends you have. There are some friends that love you so much that they tend to stand out even worse than your enemies. There are some friends that you can do without and those that you cannot do without. In all these cases you still consider them as friends.

No matter who you are, your real friends will only be visible or come into the light when you get into situations you cannot help. This is when you need your friends and that is when you get to see who your real friends are. Some friends are like Facebook who will only like everything you do but when it gets to getting their hands dirty will keep their noses clean out of your business. That is their friendship, their friendship is virtual. Like Bluetooth they connect when they are close enough to gain whatever benefits they want from your friendship.

In recent times, friendships have become very impersonal especially with the intervention of social media and all those virtual sites that keep springing up almost every day. Social media has made lying about friendship so easy and also made people’s lives such an open book. A person tells you that they are unavailable when you need their help and in a few minutes time you check their facebook status and they are at a party with pictures. This is difficult to hide and usually it hurts knowing that your friends can only be there for you when you are happy and not when you actually need them the most.

It has come to be accepted that friendship can only come with benefits and not sacrifice. Oh! you can imagine the clichés that keep popping into my head as I type this article. They say ‘love your neighbor as yourself’ but didn’t say love your neighbor more than yourself is one of those. Even the term ‘friends with benefits’ have come to take on a new and much more accepted form and has come to usually relate to the opposite sex and sexual activity.

The sacrifice involved in traditional friendship where one can go the extra mile just so another human being can be happy or satisfied is in a gone era. No more do people just do anything for the fun of it. Oh yeah another cliché: ‘there is no free lunch’. A friend will only do stuff for you with the thought at the back of his/her mind of what they are going to get from the ‘sacrifice’ they are making. Then I’m tempted to ask, is that still a sacrifice?

What happened to friendships where you helped out and didn’t even expect a thank you? You did whatever you did out of the goodness of your heart knowing that it was an act that you were ordained to do as your brother’s keeper. You helped out because you were in a position to help? It beats my mind really.

What do we see these days? People in a position to help find a job will want to sleep with you, if you are a woman or would come to an agreement with you to take a cut of your salary when you are employed. I know a lot of people can relate to this and oh! some of the stories you hear.  Doing good out of the goodness of the heart is now so old fashioned but I want to believe there are still a few good people out there and like the circle of life these people never lack anything.

I have one true friend in Jesus Christ and He assures me He is always there anytime I call on him. Then I also have my best friend whom I will do anything for even if I have to die for her. She is my eternal love and I will do anything to make her happy.  For the rest, out of the goodness of my heart, I will help you out when I can and not expect any thank you. Trust me, it is easier that way because some people are so ungrateful even when they come begging you to get them out of a situation and their later reactions beats my mind. But it’s all good.

As for my best friend, I will say I’m sorry I haven’t been that much of a friend to you lately but I will make it up to you one way or the other God being my helper. I will see to it that you are the happiest woman on earth even if it kills me because I am prepared to die for you.

To all my friends out there, thank you for letting me be your friend. It is not you who is privileged but it is me who is honored to know you and consider you as my friend. I will try my best to be a good friend to you no matter what and God being my helper let’s have a healthy friendship.


2 Responses to “My Friends”

  1. Salomey Abraham Says:

    I always wondered what happened to the “letter writing” days kindda friends. I pray God brings us back to value friendship like before and i hope you make it up to your best friend.

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